Obviously Ashlynn's father is not in the picture. Nor will he ever be. It's a complicated situation, but he was out of the picture when I was 6 weeks pregnant. He was desperate to get away, and I let him. No use forcing something when she's better off without him.
But she still has male figures in her life that she adores.
First off is my stepfather. He comes home from work and her eyes light up. He doesn't exactly sit on the floor and play with her, but he'll give her hugs, tip her upside down so she can walk on the ceiling (He did it with my sisters bringing them to bed, so she wanted to do it too!), and she loves him half to death. But it's her Poppy, of course she loves him!
Then there's my girlfriend's husband. Ashlynn absolutely adores him as well. When we are at their place, he will play with her, tickle her, toss her into the air, chase her. She's actually followed him around before. He'd chase her back into the room (Imagine hearing thumps of feet and then hysterical giggles then seeing Ashlynn burst into the room laughing with him not far behind) and as soon as he left, she was toddling after him.
If things get more serious, she may consider him a father figure, and my girlfriend as a second mother.
Even in atypical situations like my own, my daughter is loved to the max by so many people. She has all she needs with her Nana (my mom), Poppy (my stepdad), O-Nana (My grandmother), Auntie Kenzie (my sister), Auntie Nikki (my other sister), Auntie Ney Ney (My best friend), and my girlfriend and her husband, and of course her Mama.
I do wish some people were more involved. Her father is not one of them, but my father is.
He spent my life messing around with things. He'd be there. Then he wouldn't. He'd show up to see me, then he wouldn't..and I'd wait in the window for hours. "Daddy will be here! He will!" and I'd watch all the cars driving by, hoping one was him. I remember it so sickeningly clear.
When I was older, he was there for a couple years. Then one night he said I could spend the night at a friend's house. He was drunk, I'm assuming, when he said it..because the next morning I woke up to find out that he called the police and said I ran away.
He has seen his granddaughter maybe twice, and only one time was by choice.
He never said what he wants to be called, never wished her a happy birthday, never showed up for her party..
So he was written off of her life for good.
No yo-yo'ing with my baby girl's emotions. No window watching, No crying.
I make my choices with her best interest at heart, and so far I seem to be doing a very good job of it. She's thriving and happy.
